Baking-less

Because of all the construction in my house, I haven't had a chance to bake since I've gotten home. It makes me quite sad. The last thing I got to bake was Dan's birthday cake, which turned out pretty well considering it was my first time baking a cake and the frosting entirely from scratch. At first I was a bit worried, but the cake turned out great (at least, that's what everyone else told me. I barely got a bite because I was too busy doing other stuff) and it was lovely learning experience. There was a lot of left over frosting though, which ended up being thrown out because Dan didn't know what to do with it since I wasn't around anymore. What a shame. It was good stuff too; white chocolate buttercream and I didn't skimp out on the ingredients either (Ghiradelli white chocolate - it doesn't seem that bad, but it's pretty expensive on a poor college student's budget). Ahhh, I want to bake so bad! And of course, with my luck, the kitchen is the last room to be remodeled. Hopefully, it'll all be done in two weeks or so? Mmm, I hope.

I didn't get to take too many pictures because I was too preoccupied with all the food I was preparing for Dan's birthday dinner. I forgot to take pictures of the turkey I made (my first one ever too!); I was pretty mad at myself for that. But luckily, I didn't neglect to take a couple of pictures of the cake.

In the process of decorating the cake with fruit.


The final result! Two layers of white cake with white chocolate buttercream frosting, topped with strawberries and mandarin orange slices. Yum yum ^__^


It's not perfect (notice the strawberry juice staining the buttercream >.<), but it was a big hit and that's all that matters. I'll always have more opportunities to hone my baking skills. Teehee. Especially next year; it's going to be a baking fest over at GLC. Between the two of us, Steph and I will have enough baked goods in our apartment to run an underground bakery. But that's still a while away from now. Currently, I just want to be able to bake in my own house. I can't wait until the house is done with all the remodeling. I want to bake. I need to bake.

I have a job interview tomorrow! How exciting. I hope I get the job; I so need the money.

Job-hunting

Who knew it would be so hard to find a job? I've been applying to jobs since I've gotten back from school, but I still haven't heard any replies from anywhere. It's quite discouraging. Today alone, I emailed my resume to 12 different places. All I'm hoping is to hear back from at least 1.

Uhhhhh, someone please employ me! I'm friendly, outspoken, organized, detail-oriented, friendly, articulate, a fast learner, and good with people (in other words, friendly!). Please hire me!

Why is it so hard? :(

All we can do is keep breathing

I shouldn't try so hard. These things should be more natural. It's kind of ridiculous that I recite silly little instructions to myself about how I should do that or this. My mother is always telling me what to do, what I should do, how I should act, and look. All of her words are beating me down. I can't think clearly. I'm tired of listening to her. I hear her words, but my mind is too full to take anything in. I'm tired. I don't even have the strength to tell her that I can't take this verbal abuse anymore. I need some room to fly. I need some space to do things my own way.

I miss Rochester. I miss my independence.

How does she expect me to be independent when she makes me so reliant on her?

I need to clear my head. All I can do is keep breathing.
This will all be over soon.

How babies are made

This is what I'm going to tell my kids one day when they ask that question.