I haven't slept since I woke up on Wednesday morning. I'm starting to feel really tired right now. The exhaustion is beginning to catch up to me. I haven't really stopped at this today to rest. After my paper, I passed out at my desk for a little bit, and then showered, got breakfast and went to class. After class, I grabbed lunch and went home and ended up watching Heroes. I'm finally caught up and now I can watch the latest episode! I'm a bit late, but whatever! Anyhoo, after that I went to ITS to print out my Chinese homework, only to discover that the homework wasn't in my gmail so I had to walk back (in the snow. It started snowing like crazy for the entire afternoon) to my room to re-email it to myself. Then I went to RR to print it out, and ended up having to wait for the printer because it was stalled. Afterwards, I went to Chinese class and after Chinese, I had work until 5 at the bookstore. It's been a pretty busy day. I got dinner with some awesome people at Danforth (mmmm, tonight was a special night. They had prime rib and snow crab legs. Omgsh, our table consumed so much crab) and now I'm at Carlson with Justin and Eric the freshman. It's going to be another long, long night to paper writing and procrastinating. Oytothevey. I can't wait until all this is over. I am going to sleep SO much. SO SO MUCH.

So I got really excited earlier because I found this awesome cupcake bakery that's located near my cousin's house. I'm going to try to visit over winter break. Ahh, reading food blogs and looking at pictures of food make me feel happy. Sometimes I think I should just quit college and open up my own pastry shop. HAHA, yeah right. I'm not even that great at baking. I need more practice and more time to experiment with different recipes. Gah, I really really want to bake now.

Random picture of the cake that I baked for Steve and Karen's goodbye party at church. My first attempt at cake decoration. HAHA, I'm such a noob.

So, on a completely different note, I've decided to compile a list of all the things I'm hoping to do over winter break. Just because I can't concentrate right now, and because I don't want to work on my Chinese composition just yet...

Things I want to do over winter break
1. Visit Rockefeller Center to see the Christmas tree.
2. Go to Magnolia Bakery.
3. PINKBERRY! <3
4. Drink lots and lots of bubble tea.
5. Eat xiao long bao (小笼包) and shen jian bao (生煎包).
6. Watch Enchanted and I Am Legend
7. Eat lots of Korean food!
8. And Chinese food.
9. And Japanese food.
10. Just Asian food in general.
11. Go to Max Brenner: Chocolate by the Bald Man in Union Square.
12. Go ice skating in Central Park. Or just ice skating in general.
13. Go the Sweet Avenue Bake Shop in Rutherford, NJ
14. Spend New Year's with amazing people.
15. Make a snow man and snow angels!
16. Spend lots of time catching up with old friends.
17. Buy new boots.
18. Go to Boston for fun.
19. Get root beer floats @ the FAO Schwartz ice cream parlor!
20. Bake, bake, bake.
21. Make chocolate lollipops :)

I can't wait to leave this place.

One down, one more to go

It is currently 6:33 in the freaking morning. I just finished my final research paper for CAS. I am officially done. I'm so happy that I've finally gotten this over with, but I'm too tired to feel anything. I have another paper waiting to be done after this. It's longer this time and it's going to take so much effort to do it. Sometimes I honestly wonder why I chose to be a history major. All these papers, all this reading, I think I complain more than I should. Do I complain about it too much? It's all so overwhelming. I love history, but I'm not as interested as I used to be in high school. I think it's the fact that I don't have a good relationship with any of my professors. Mansdorf and I had such a great relationship, and I really enjoyed going to his class every day even though I knew that he would assign us mountain loads (what seemed like mountain loads of work at the time. I know better now. So much better) of homework.

I'm so drained right now. But I don't have the luxury of putting my head down right now to rest. I need to finish my Chinese homework and then shower, wake up Rena, grab breakfast, print out my paper, give Dan a wake-up call and then go to CAS class. I don't think I'm going to get any sleep until Saturday. I have work until 5, and then after that I'm going straight to the library to work on my history paper. I'm writing about the problem of immigration during the late 19th and early 20th centuries. It shouldn't be that bad. But it is. I have to get sources and cite my information. I hate sources and I hate bibliographies. I'm really bad at writing papers. My writing's gotten so bad. I never have a chance to write because I want to. Rather, I'm forced to write because I need to pass school. I don't know what it is. I just hate researching and pulling quotes and whatever. It takes so much time and energy. And I suck at organizing my time. I know this paper is going to take forever.

Do I even make sense anymore? I should be tired, but I don't feel anything. At least, I don't think I feel anything. I don't know what's going on. I need to shower. I need to get up and walk around. I've lost all feeling in my body.